Sauna & Sun glasses

Minus 18 degrees out there! I yelled on a Saturday morning after I watched the news and jumped on my partners back in bed. It is Siberian colds out there! I made up to jump out of bed too. Let’s have a breakfast and then make some fire and read a book. Or play strip chess. *wink*
He did not command.

Later at breakfast he told me he had a better idea what to do. I listen to him with wide open ears: he wanted to go to the sauna.
Sounded good to me. I agreed immediately, it is warm, relaxing. Wonderful idea. A warm idea – to tell the truth. ☺

We drove through the wonderful snow, deep in the Brandenburg. I was looking forward to the feeling of feeling warm to my bones.
There we were! After over an hour of traveling to the dream that I had when I heard the weather broadcast on TV. – Minus 18 damn degrees! –
We went to the changing cabins and changed. I wore my bikini and a dressing gown over it.

We took our showers and searched a finish sauna where we could go. I took off my dressing gown and sat in there – my partner told me I should be taking off the bikini. I asked him if he was out of his mind, I would never ever do that. This is how WE went to sauna in the UK or the USA.
He whispered that this is not acceptable in germany. I laughed. And said that “ it is not acceptable for me to take off my bikini. Sorry hun bun.”

He smiled. After 10 minutes I went out. The moment I stepped out of the sauna a person in charge cropped out of nothing right next to me: “Meine Dame, haben Sie das Schild am Eingang nicht gelesen?- Hier ist Textilfreie Zone.”

I took a look at him with wide open eyes, wanted to say something, but could not. Just blushed. After about 30 seconds of silence- he kept on looking at me- expecting me to say something. And yeaa….. I made it to say something: “In the country where I come from we go to the sauna like this.”

He answered with his heavy German accent:
“Here is XXX in Brandenburg, not the USA or England.” – Gosh! He was right- Und hier ist textilfreie Zone”
The next two rounds in the sauna i set in there with my partner but wore sunglasses.
This time my partner made fun of me: people take a look at you more when you sit
here with sunglasses Eveline. Did I care? I did not! I was naked enough and had to stay anonymous!

Today, I dare to go to the sauna without any textile and any sunglasses. (That took me a year or two to give up)
And thinking: the USA is the biggest industry for sex portals and sex toys and all that jazz. So it is in the UK. Why the hell we just are up brought this way? I admire the German ladies and their approach to thing at times. I think I might either need years or will need a life time to be 100% Schwarz, rot, gold – in this aspect. Just a few weeks ago, in a training in a gynecological clinic the assistants and I are doing a role play on the phone and I explained the problem – although it is another lady I am talking to- in a very discrete way.
The remark from the German doctor assistant: well, this is exactly how the English speaking patient talks about the problem with us on the phone. Our German ladies tell everything to the last detail!


Text: Eveline Goodman.

„Eveline Goodman ist Geschäftsführerin von EforP – English for Professionals, einem Sprachinstitut, das sich auf maßgeschneiderte Trainings – auf „Integrated Trainings“ sowie auf Sprachtrainings – für Unternehmer und deren Mitarbeiter spezialisiert hat.

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